The only way we can deal with the summer heat is to shift from normal silk button downs to sleeveless silk button downs. Well, that and putting extra ice in our whiskey.Continue reading
Seeing as we’ve never been fans of anything that adds inches to our waists (okay, except maybe carrot cake, wine, bagels, bourbon, cheese, pizza, cheese pizza, Cadbury Crème Eggs, nachos, bacon, fries, and white bread), it shouldn’t come as a surprise that initially we wanted nothing to do with the peplum trend. But, if we can let Katy Perry and natural peanut butter (ugh, stirring) infiltrate our lives, then there’s probably room for a peplum or two.
Assuming you don’t want to waste the results of your month-long cleanse, stay away from styles that add bulk and instead opt for peplums that fall closer to the body. It’s the difference between a ruffle and a structured panel around your waist. It’s Fettuccine versus Farfalle. Which pasta shape would you rather have wrapped around what should be the slimmest part of your body? Obviously Fettuccine — we would wrap ourselves in that. Maybe with a little butter, some parsley, a nice white wine sauce. And clams. And fresh Parmesan. And a loaf of garlic bread on the side.
Sorry, we’re having cleanse-induced carbohydrate hallucinations. We’re on day two.
We know that if you’ve been bad you get a lump of coal in your stocking (which, to be honest, sounds kind of awesome—you can totally use it to barbeque come summer), and if you’ve been good, you get rewarded with awesome presents. Well, we don’t want to toot our own horns (yes we do), but we’ve been pretty good this year. We didn’t put all of our drinks on our college enemy’s bar tab without her knowing even though it would have been super easy that one night. We didn’t run on stage during our niece’s dance recital because we hate when she gets more attention than we do. We didn’t set our neighbor’s car on fire for blocking the UPS guy the day he was supposed to deliver our new Rag & Bone boots. Yeah, we know, we deserve some gifts.
Unfortunately, gift-buying can be difficult. So, in an effort to avoid another year of our parents giving us gym memberships and GMAT prep books (thanks, we get the hint) we put together this list of the things we really want. Since we’re always thinking ahead, just in case your family and friends don’t come through this year, we’ve also included some helpful tips on acquiring these yourself.
Also, we looked into it, turns out you can’t buy “Jon Hamm being your husband” online.
The Wish: Comme des Garcons, Low-Top Canvas Sneakers, $100.
The Why: These are perfect for all those times we’re sprinting to catch the train, or racing to get to the dry cleaners before they close, or purposely hurling ourselves in front of cars so that Ryan Gosling will save (and then obviously marry) us.
The How: Need $100? Just spend one night not drinking in New York City. Boom, done.
This is the time of year that people start having holiday parties (not that we would know, but that’s what Facebook tells us). Among the many kinds of parties — office holiday parties, cocktail parties, cookie decorating parties, dinner parties, key parties — our favorite is the “Ugly Christmas Sweater” party. We more fondly refer to these as “AWESOME SWEATER TIME WITH CASUAL ACQUAINTANCES AND MULLED WINE.”
We’re not sure what these sweaters did to get such a bad rap; what’s better than a cozy pullover covered in wild game and some healthy conifers? Honestly, not much. Is it the animals? A few geese get in the way of a plane that manages to land unharmed and suddenly they’re a national safety threat, but Amanda Bynes just runs people down with her car and we’re all just supposed to be okay with it? Give us a break.
Also, holiday sweaters mean you can coordinate your outfit with your meal. Christmas goose and Christmas goose? Yes, please! We’ll have seconds!
However, holiday sweaters are like prescription bottle tops or Spanx — they’re kind of tricky to pull off. The key to wearing sweaters like these is to choose them the same way HR chooses office holiday decorations: don’t get too Christmasy. It’s like the separation of church and state; start to blur the line and everyone is going to yell at you.
So feel free to pick your favorite woodland creature and tear up eBay this week. May as well get reacquainted with the site now; where else are you going to sell the hand-knitted toilet seat cover and economy-size bottle of generic vitamins your adult niece gave you?
(all via eBay)
We’re just days away from our second favorite holiday of the year: Thanksgiving! Our favorite holiday is obviously Cinco de Mayo, but since not every celebration can be all about tacos and margaritas, Thanksgiving comes in (a distant) second. Putting together an outfit for Thanksgiving dinner can be like switching shampoos; there’s a lot to consider. You need to factor in judgmental relatives, overeating, and temperature concerns that make global warming look like no big deal.
We’ve got dressing for Thanksgiving dinner down to a science, but don’t worry, it’s a soft science we can actually understand, like anthropology or baking (we can’t stress enough that we were English majors). Just follow our guide to a foolproof outfit and the only thing that will be able to ruin Thanksgiving dinner will be your adorable cousin asking the whole dinner table, “Why are you the only girl in the family that isn’t married?”
Skirt, Rag & Bone, $200
This skirt is a total no-brainer (or as we like to call it, a Ryan Lochte) because it’s got a stretchy waist and it’s super comfortable, unlike your uncle’s weird jokes about “the wishbone.” We generally avoid pants for big meals; a skirt ensures that we’ll keep cool and protect against the meat sweats. This skirt also has a stain-hiding print, so feel free to pound the gravy right out of the boat this year.
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